Stop complaining and start gaining ( 1 - 6 )

Stop complaining and start gaining (1)

'Do everything without complaining...' Philippians 2:14 NIV

Moan, moan, moan, whinge, whinge, whinge, whine, whine, whine! Complaining; we hear it all the time and come on, be honest, you do it too, right?

'Oh no I don't!' we protest to anyone who dares accuse us of arguing. We can do it so often we don't even realise we're doing it. 'It wasn't me, it was her.' Or, 'He made me do it, it's not my fault.' Sound familiar? They're actually excuses like those used by Adam and Eve. Can you believe it? Even the first two humans, living in the lap of luxury with God, found something to beef about!

As soon as they ate that forbidden fruit they were arguing and moaning about whose fault it was. It didn't help then (they both got chucked out of paradise) and it doesn't help now either. That's why God says to you today, 'Do everything without complaining...' He knows it gets us nowhere. He knows we'll only end up making things worse for ourselves.

Read Exodus or Numbers, and you'll hear God's people whinging big time! Paul warns us not to fall into the same trap: 'Do not complain as some of them did; they were killed by the angel that destroys. The things that happened to those people are examples...written down to teach us...' (1 Corinthians 10:10-11 NCV) So clean up your verbal act! Decide to detect, reject and eject all complaining language from your vocabulary.

Stop complaining and start gaining (2)

God says: 'Do everything without complaining ...' because complaining is toxic. It's poisonous! It damages and contaminates! There is nothing good about it. It acts like a drug dealer, giving people a taste so before they know it, they're hooked. The more you do it, the more you want to do it, and the harder it is to stop-it's addictive. Inject 'complaint poison' into your life and eventually it will 'toxify' every bit of it. Subtly, it will pollute all your relationships, your church, your family, your neighbourhood.

Sometimes we think we have to moan and complain. We think there is only one option and that's to sound off. But do the maths-nothing positive can come from a negative.

Complaining is a cop-out, it's what we do to avoid facing a problem. It actually makes us part of the problem instead of the solution. And ultimately, your complaining affects you more than anyone else. The Psalmist said, '...I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed...' (Psalm 77:3 NKJ) Every time you act like a Moaning Minnie you reinforce the power of 'complaint poison' over you, making yourself the victim of your own lethal complaints. Before you say anything stop and think. Then 'do all things without complaining...'

Stop complaining and start gaining (3)

Come on, be honest-did you read the verse for today and think: 'They're not still on about complaining, are they?' And then did you have a quick look, see that we're going to be reading the same verse for another three days and think, 'You've got to be kidding! Do we really have to hear about it for a whole six days? Enough already! "Stop moaning"-I get it!'

Well, if that's the case, you'll know why we're keeping at it! Because it's so easy to moan about anything! Even word4U2day!

In order to start or stop doing anything, we need to know why. What's the point? What's in it for me? God never asks us to do something without it benefiting us. Listen: 'Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe.' (Philippians 2:14-15 NIV)

When the stars are out, it is impossible not to notice them. They look amazing, they stand out! You don't just glance at them. You watch them because they are truly beautiful. When we pack in our moaning, sulky, argumentative behaviour, God says we will stand out. We'll be noticed, we'll be as impressive as the stars. Everyone will be able to see God in us. Now that's worth doing, right?

Stop complaining and start gaining (4)

What's your attitude been like this week? Have you honestly been trying to 'Do everything without complaining'? Has it been easy to do? Or are you thinking, 'It's impossible, I can't do it! See-I'm even moaning about moaning now!'

Well, be encouraged today. You need to remember that God never asks us to do anything without helping us to do it. 'You are tempted in the same way all other human beings are. God is faithful. He will not let you be tempted any more than you can take. But when you are tempted, God will give you a way out so that you can stand up under it.' (1 Corinthians 10:13 NIV) So next time you're about to get in a strop, simmer down and talk to God first. Ask Him to show you a better way, then take it.

But what if your complaint is legit? After all, injustice, abuse, betrayal, robbery, gossip, lies, prejudice, physical harm against you or your family are legitimate causes for complaint, right? So you can't just sit back and do nothing, can you? Jesus says, 'You are the light of the world...people do not light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand. Then it gives light to everyone... In the same way, let your light shine in front of others.' (Matthew 5:14-16 NIV) We need to always do things God's way. So, don't 'mouth off' without first talking to God about the best thing to do in your situation.

Stop complaining and start gaining (5)

When someone hurts you, your temptation will be to tell everybody and have a right good moan! It feels acceptable, justified, and even therapeutic. Well-meaning friends will encourage it and maybe even help you publicise it. 'You'll feel better when you've got it off your chest,' they'll say. But God says, 'Do everything without complaining...' Even when you're cheesed off, had enough and just can't take it anymore! When someone hurts you, God says we need to have some 1-2-1 time and wrap it in kindness:

(1) 1-2-1 time: In other words, no putting an ad in the paper 'naming and shaming'. 'If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offence. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back.' (Matthew 18:15 NLT)

(2) Wrapped in kindness: So, no barging in like Mr Angry, shouting in their face, ready to head-butt them. '...speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ...' (Ephesians 4:15 NLT)
Remember your goal is not to humiliate them or to get revenge, but rather to sort out the problem, resolve your differences, strengthen your relationship, and honour God.

Even when we do everything right and deliver the best 1-2-1 time wrapped in kindness ever, it will only resolve itself if the other person responds well. But this doesn't mean you now have a right to get all stroppy. God always has the best next step, so listen to Him.

Stop complaining and start gaining (6)

Here are three final thoughts on complaining:

SALSA: Stop Accusing Loudly, Start Asking. No one likes it when we go about shooting our mouths off. People either become aggressive towards us or completely ignore us. However legitimate your gripe, all people will hear and see is a complainer. This will greatly reduce the chance of a good outcome. Whatever the cause: 'SALSA!' You're more likely to get what you ask for if you do it graciously, rather than beef on about it. Asking for help-or for understanding, or to share how you feel, or for someone to do things differently-avoids arguments, stops you wasting time raking over the past about things that can't be changed and always brings a better result.

Back off: Once you've said it, now let God work. Changing people is God's job, so back off, be patient and give Him a chance. Get out of God's way and let Him do what you can't. He has ways and means you've never dreamed of. When He's allowed to take over the job, it gets done properly.

Do a Joey: No sitting around biting your tongue, seething when things don't go to plan. Take a lesson from Joseph. He had every reason to complain about his family and to take revenge. Instead, he kept focused on God and looked to see how he could become part of the solution. It works! Joseph's family was reunited, and God gave him some amazing things to do with his life.

Wednesday, 11 August 2010 00:00

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