Have you ever been dumped by a boyfriend or girlfriend? Rejected by your mates? Abandoned by your parents? If yes to any of these, you wouldn't be human if you didn't feel hurt. Sometimes the pain and sadness lasts for years. What's weird is that even if nothing like this has ever happened to us, we could still worry about it: fearful that one day someone will dump us, reject us or abandon us. No-one wants to be left alone. At some point we all experience the heartbreak of losing someone we love, or being disappointed in people. It's why God tells us over and over, 'Fear not for I am with you.' (Isaiah 43:5 NKJ) Jesus knows what it's like to be rejected by friends, and not just once! A whole bunch of his friends told Him to get lost. 'At this point many of His disciples turned away and deserted Him.' (John 6:66 NLT) So how did He cope? He didn't deny his emotions. He said: 'Are you also going to leave?' (John 6:67 NLT) It's all there: the pain of loss, wondering what's going to happen next. Remember the pain you feel is ok. Those who say, 'You shouldn't feel this way,' are well-meaning but wrong. Acknowledging pain initiates the feeling-dealing-healing process. You can't heal what you won't feel or deal with. So, embrace your feelings, draw on God's grace, and move through the healing process.
Q: When negative experiences happen, what's your greatest enemy? A: Your own head! We worry and let our thoughts dictate the pace. Jesus was about to face His greatest trial, so He went out into the Garden of Gethsemane to pray. 'Not My will,' He said to His Father (and ours), 'but yours!' We need to let God in on our thoughts, let God control our thinking. If we don't, our thoughts run riot in our heads making us fearful, depressed, alone. Romans 12:2 NKJ says, '�be transformed by the renewing of your minds.' Get God stuff in your head: When you say, 'I can't solve this!' God tells you, 'I will direct your path.' (Proverbs 3:6) When you say, 'It's impossible!', God tells you, 'Everything is possible.' (Luke 18:27) When you say, 'I feel all alone!', God tells you, 'Never will I leave you.' (Hebrews 13:5) When you say, 'I can't do it!', God tells you, 'I can do everything through Him who gives me strength.' (Philippians 4:13) When you say, 'I don't deserve forgiveness!', God tells you, 'I have forgiven you.' (1 John 1:9, Romans 8:1) When you say, 'I'm afraid!', God tells you, 'Do not fear for I am with you, I will strengthen you and help you.' (Isaiah 41:10) When you say, 'No-one really loves me!', God tells you 'I love you.' (John 3:16) When you say, 'I don't know how to go on!', God tells you 'I will show you.' (Psalm 32:8)
Being abandoned, ditched, dropped, jilted, neglected, rejected can mess with our heads so much. When stuff like this happens, we tend to handle it by turning into one of three characters: The Boxer: We mouth off big time! Never throwing the towel in, we fight to the finish! The Actor: We pretend it doesn't matter, act like it makes no difference to us: 'I'm perfectly fine, thank you!' The Assassin: We plot revenge; 'I don't get mad, I get even!' Mouthing off, pretending we're fine, or plotting revenge will only leave us getting more hurt and probably hurt others in the process. So what should we do? Have you heard of the game Truth or Dare? You choose between Truth and Dare. Pick truth and you have to answer in total honesty any question that your friends ask you. Choose dare and you have to participate in a challenge set to you by your friends. But have you ever played Truth AND Dare? It's not so much a game but a way of life that God wants us to live; especially when we are feeling rejected. Jesus knows how that feels: He went to the Cross not only rejected by His friends but knowing that God Himself would turn away as He took on the sin of the world. TRUTH: Know God's truth about you. Jesus died for you. God says: '�you are precious to me. You are honoured, and I love you.' (Isaiah 43:4 NLT) DARE: to act on God's truth and not on your feelings! Live, knowing you're precious!
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